How do I Improve my Boundaries?

How do I Improve my Boundaries?

Improve Boundaries

Setting and maintaining healthy boundaries is essential for leading a fulfilling life. Personal boundaries exist to protect your physical, emotional, and mental well-being and encourage healthy relationships. When you clarify your boundaries, you open yourself up to the opportunity to nurture more satisfying relationships, manage your time and energy more effectively, and reduce your stress levels. Establishing boundaries is not easy, especially if you have a tendency to people-please. If you often say “yes” out of guilt or because you are afraid to upset others, then you know it is time to examine your boundaries. Below are some helpful tips to assist you in forming healthy boundaries in your life.

Identify Your Boundaries

To begin, identify your values, feelings, and priorities. Consider what is important to you and how you want to protect it. A good way to begin this process is to reflect on your emotional state and identify what emotional triggers you experience in different situations. Once you clarify what values and emotions drive you, you will have a better idea of what boundaries to set. Beginning this process can be difficult, but one thing to remember is that if people are becoming upset by your new boundaries, you are heading in the right direction. Everyone should not have an infinite amount of access to your time, energy, and emotions, but reclaiming your life can cause others to become confused. This confusion can be diminished by having a healthy conversation about why and how you are reshaping your life. By setting proper boundaries you can increase your time management skills and create a safe space to recharge your emotional batteries.



Take responsibility for communicating your boundaries. To ensure that you are getting your point across, it is important to be firm, but also remember to be respectful. It is helpful to use “I” statements to explain how you are feeling without being confrontational. For example, you could say something like “When you talk to me in that tone of voice, I feel hurt and devalued.” This gives you the opportunity to explain how you feel without being accusatory or putting the blame on others. Your feelings are real and need to be validated. If someone in your life is not okay with this or tends to dismiss your feelings, it may be time to distance yourself and consider their role in your life.

Be Consistent

Enforcing boundaries can be difficult, especially if you have never set limits with others. Be consistent with your boundaries despite attempts to override them. If someone repeatedly ignores your boundaries, speak up. It is helpful to remind them of your limits, but be prepared to walk away if necessary. Boundaries are a sign of respect and demonstrate you value the other person. Anyone who refuses to accept them may not have a spot in your future life. The life where you choose to be the best, most loving version of yourself. A good way to begin this process is to simply say “no” when you feel the need to do so. Having a set plan in place so that you can proactively respond, instead of react in the moment, can prevent you from sinking back into your old habits.

Take care of Yourself

Care for Yourself

Self-care is so important if you desire to be a healthy and whole individual. This means caring for your emotional, mental, and physical self in a compassionate way. To practice emotional boundaries, consistently reflect on how you are feeling and take note when you notice a dip in your energy or mood. Doing so provides a road map for your limits and shows you where to draw the line in the future. To mentally care for your well-being, set limits on interactions with negative people and do not ruminate on negative subjects. Establishing healthy physical boundaries can include eating healthy foods and limiting sugar, or going to bed at the same time each night. This provides your body with stability and ensures you have the energy to get the things done that matter most to you.

Next Steps

Starting a new habit can seem intimidating but can be accomplished with the right help. We hope these guidelines encourage you to set healthy limits in your life. Should you have further questions about boundaries or need assistance in designing a life that inspires you, our therapists at New Vision Counseling and Consulting are here for you. We thrive on providing an understanding and compassionate space for you to share your story and get the help you need. Obtaining an empathetic and objective view of the obstacles that hold you back can be life-changing. Are you ready to begin your journey to a healthier you? Call today at (405) 921-7776

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Andrew BrownAndrew Brown
11:05 06 Feb 24
Shawn called me directly and sought out a resolution with me for a recent poor experience I had. He showed genuine care and consideration over the phone, and demonstrated he truly cares about the clients that come here and wants everyone to get the help they need. That's how it needs to be in any place helping others in God. God bless.
Andy EatonAndy Eaton
21:00 11 Oct 23
I totally recommend Josh Rhoades. He's helped me overcome a lot of anxiety and work-related stress and the effects it's had on me this year. For any guys out there wondering if they should go to counseling, you should definitely give Josh and New Vision a try.
Mark VonFeldtMark VonFeldt
12:04 23 Aug 23
I admit I didn't think I needed counciling but when I hit a tough period in life. Caleb McKean at New Vison Counseling was extrodinary in helping me out and providing encourgement, prespective and confidence. In addition, it was great seeing Shawn McGuire who consitantly provided an uplifting personality that’s just contagious.
Elizabeth ProtzmanElizabeth Protzman
11:41 24 May 23
My husband and I just wrapped up counseling with Shawn. And if you told me 6 months ago our family would be how we are now, I would have been in total disbelief. Shawn’s approach to counseling is next level and took us to new places we never thought that we could experience freedom and he put a light on places we never knew were still dragging us down.My husband (before counseling) had past trauma that weighed him down so heavily that his negative self talk was taking over his mental life. He was completely unable to be social anywhere, see positivity in anything, and talked with a super meek voice because he didn’t see worth in himself. We thought that “this is just his personality”, but Shawn was able to uncover the trauma that was holding him back and helped him break free of it. He now speaks with a voice to be heard and even he engages in social situations!I went through a terrible health scare while we were going through sessions. My optometrist thought that I had a tumor or fluid build up in my skull. Shawn helped me navigate all of the feelings that I kept shoving down. On my second session of talking about this medical situation, we really got to the root of my stress and behavior in this situation and in life. I felt a ton of weight lifted off of me in that moment just by digging out every root in my heart that wasn’t welcome there. Later that day (a Thursday) I had my MRI scans and that Sunday I woke up headache/migraine free for the first time in four months. Monday I got the news that nothing was there. I truly believe that God did a healing work in that therapy session. A physical healing of my body and a spiritual healing of my mind.Through all of this Shawn was not only there for just our counseling sessions, but when I was going through all of the medical stuff he would check in and see how everything was going. He recommended for my husband to go to a camp that absolutely played a part in changing my husband’s life. And all that I’ve shared is only the surface of all of the healing we received. I would have to write a novel for the rest, lol.If you’re looking for healing and willing to show up and put in the work…Shawn will help you get there.
Steve RodriguezSteve Rodriguez
14:25 06 May 22
New Vision Counseling and Consulting saved my marriage as they helped and are helping me deal with my issues with depression and anxiety. I have been taught new methods of dealing with these issues and they are life saving. I have enjoyed my experience with Shawn Maguire, the best therapist I could ask for, and feel this place is a Godsend. I never thought therapy would work for me but I was wrong and wish I had come here sooner. Excited for what the future holds.

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